Page 86 - Microaggressions in Everyday Live Race, Gender, and Sexual Orientation

60 the psychological dilemmas and dynamics of microaggressions

3. Do not invalidate the experiential realities of diverse groups in our
society. Be aware that privilege and power oftentimes makes it dif-
fi cult to see the perspectives of those who experience discrimination
and prejudice in their day-to-day lives. Don’t be quick to dismiss and
negate challenges. Entertain the notion that disempowered groups in
our society often have a more accurate perception of reality that deals
with their day-to-day experiences of insults and invalidations due to
their racial, gender, or sexual identities. If indeed microaggressions are
indicative of worldviews of inclusion–exclusion, normality–abnormality,
and superiority–inferiority, then it is important to become aware that
your view of the world may be culture-bound and prevent you from
seeing the world through the eyes of other groups. Instead of deny-
ing their racial, gender, or sexual-orientation realities, try to under-
stand their frame of reference. Don’t become defensive and impose
your interpretation of situations or actions upon those who challenge your
views. This recommendation dictates that (1) you become aware of
your values, biases, and assumptions about human behavior—your
worldview—and (2) the experiential realities of other groups—their
worldviews.
4. Related to all the points above has been our constant emphasis on not
becoming defensive when people of color, women, or LGBTs imply that
you have personally engaged in a microaggressive remark or behavior.
Being open to discussing, exploring, and clarifying the matter will do
much to engender trust and to positively seal a relationship. Not only
will you grow from the experience, but it will have a healing and liberating
effect on marginalized group members that will counteract the years of
pain and humiliation they have been forced to endure. I would surmise
that all of us have committed microaggressions or racial, gender, and
sexual-orientation blunders. The issue should not be “to cover up” but
how to recover. In many cases a simple “I’m sorry” is all that may be
called for.
5. Finally, it is important to view microaggressions as reactions to unjust
exposure to hostile and invalidating societal climates that insult,
demean, and invalidate marginalized groups. Reactions of anger, impa-
tience, and frustration communicated to perpetrators should be seen
in an empathic manner and not pathologized. To do so blames the
victim by focusing on their responses, rather than on the unhealthy
environments that create such responses. I am not arguing that there

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