Page 132 - Cultures and Organizations

I, We, and They 111

whereas face and philotimo are defined from the point of view of the social
environment.
Collectivist societies usually have ways of creating family-like ties with
persons who are not biological relatives but who are socially integrated
into one’s in-group. In Latin America, for example, this can be done via
the institution of compadres and comadres who are treated as relatives even
if they are not. The institution of godfathers and godmothers, which was
traditionally strong in the Catholic and Orthodox countries of Europe, is
another example. In Japan younger sons in past times became apprentices
to crafts masters through a form of adoption. Similar customs existed in
medieval central Europe.
Because people in collectivist societies have to respect the opinions of
their relatives, selection of marriage partners is a crucial event, not only
for the partners but also for both their families. The American David Buss
coordinated a survey study of criteria for selecting a potential marriage
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partner. His respondents comprised almost ten thousand young women
and men, with an average age of twenty-three, from thirty-seven coun-
tries. Universally desired characteristics of both brides and grooms were
mutual love, kindness, emotional stability, intelligence, and health. Other
characteristics varied between brides and grooms and across countries.
Country differences were primarily related to individualism. In collectivist
countries, bridegrooms preferred brides to be younger, and they put more
stress on their being wealthy, industrious, and chaste. Brides in collectivist
countries wanted their grooms to be older and wealthier, but the groom’s
industriousness to them played a smaller role, and the groom’s chastity
none at all.
The bridegrooms’ desire for chastity in their brides, however, depended
even more on the countries’ poverty than on their collectivism. Increas-

ing affluence provides women with more educational opportunities (in any

society, when education first becomes available, parents give priority to
boys, who are not needed around the house). Girls start to move around
more freely and get more opportunities for meeting boys. People have
more living space and privacy. Medical care and dissemination of informa-
tion improve, including know-how about contraception. Young people get
more opportunities for sexual exploration, and sexual norms adapt to this
situation.
The stress on the brides’ industriousness, wealth, and chastity in col-
lectivist societies is a consequence of the fact that marriage is a contract