Page 128 - Cultures and Organizations

I, We, and They 107

sarily be inferred as an approval, since it is used to maintain the line of
communication: “yes, I heard you” is the meaning it has in Japan.
In individualist cultures, on the other hand, speaking one’s mind is a
virtue. Telling the truth about how one feels is characteristic of a sincere
and honest person. Confrontation can be salutary; a clash of opinions is
believed to lead to a higher truth. The effect of com mun ications on other
people should be taken into account, but it does not, as a rule, justify chang-
ing the facts. Adult individuals should be able to take direct feedback con-
structively. In the family, children are instructed that one should always

tell the truth, even if it hurts. Coping with conflict is a normal part of
living together as a family.
A former Dutch missionary in Indonesia (a country with an IDV of 14
and a rank of 70–71) told about his parishioners’ unexpected exegesis of the
following parable from the Bible: “A man had two sons. He went to the fi rst
and said, ‘Son, go and work in the vineyard today’; he replied, ‘I will go, sir,’
but he did not go. The man went to the second and said the same to him. He
replied, ‘I will not,’ but afterwards he changed his mind and did go. Which
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of the two did the will of the father?” The biblical answer is that the last

did, but the missionary’s Indonesian parishioners chose the first, for this son
observed the formal harmony and did not contradict his father. Whether he
actually went was of secondary importance. In one of Gert Jan’s classes, a

Greek student inquired, “Were others present?” If so, the first son would,
in the student’s opinion, have something going for him, for not shaming his
father in public. Greece has a culture of intermediate collectivism.
In the collectivist family, children learn to take their bearings from
others when it comes to opinions. Personal opinions do not exist: opinions
are predetermined by the group. If a new issue comes up on which there is
no established group opinion, some kind of family conference is necessary
before an opinion can be given. A child who repeatedly voices opinions

deviating from what is collectively felt is considered to have a bad charac-
ter. In the individualist family, on the contrary, children are expected and
encouraged to develop opinions of their own, and a child who always only
reflects the opinions of others is considered to have a weak character. The

behavior corresponding with a desirable character depends on the cultural
environment.
The loyalty to the group that is an essential element of the collectivist
family also means that resources are shared. If one member of an extended