Page 284 - Just Promoted A 12 Month Road Map for Success in Your New Leadership Role

Creating Your New Life Integration 269

sonal and family priorities and values. This principle is closely related to prin-
ciple 1. Think about the Doyle family and the Sterling family. One decision
resulted in shaking the basic foundation on which the family system existed.
Bob Doyle’s promotion was, on the surface, a peak event, the high point of his
career. But Bob, Linda, and their children did not take the time to consider the
effects of this promotion on each individual family member and on the family
as a whole. If they had, the Doyles might have anticipated many potential prob-
lems. The decision affected key areas of their lives. With reflection, they might
have made a clearer choice whether to pursue and then accept (or not accept)
the promotion. The entire family could have been involved in thinking through
the pros and cons, the trade-offs and payoffs, and they might have discovered
creative ways to deal with anticipated problems. Communication and involve-
ment dramatically increase the possibility of commitment and buy-in.
While the first year of Susan’s new job was challenging for the Sterling
family, they lessened the stress by anticipating some of the difficulties. They
took time to think about what they each needed and worked together to make
the best of a difficult situation. Although having Doug keep an apartment
near his law firm in their originating city was not ideal, it allowed him to
continue the work he loved. Susan was able to take on the challenge she had
been looking for as the next step in her career. By hiring extra help until they
could relocate the children, Doug could attend to his work without worry-
ing about having to do extra household chores that would have taken away
from the time he could spend with his sons. Susan used the time she was
away from the family during the relocation to be visible in her new role and
spend time with her key stakeholders. Yes, the transition was stressful, but
the Sterlings felt they came out of it even stronger as professionals, as a cou-
ple, and as a family.
Here are some additional guidelines:

■ Confide in and involve those that you love and who love you in how,
when, and if you will accept an opportunity to take on new leadership
responsibility. Even when answers are not clear, keep talking and work-
ing on good solutions. They will come.
■ Diagnose, plan, and solve problems both individually and as a family.
■ Be sensitive to the hopes, fears, and concerns of a mate and of children,
particularly if a relocation is required. This will be a time of adjustment.
It will include broken, new, and interrupted relationships. It will be
strange and can be very scary.