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196 Retaining Top Employees

• A mentor has an independent relationship with her pro-
tégé, not one based on authority or power. She will listen,
question, and only then advise. Her advice will be given
without judgment or criticism of the other as an individual.
• A mentor is above all person-focused. A mentor will have
no stake in the relationship, other than wanting to see the
development of the individual, and will start with a bias in
the protégé’s favor.
• A mentor is a trusted friend, a teacher, a guide and role
model. He has knowledge that he is prepared to transfer
to others, is expert, or at least has advanced status in his
field, and is acknowledged as such by his peers.
• A mentor is nurturing by nature, noncompetitive and sup-
portive. She is patient, but prepared to challenge her pro-
tégé, shows enthusiasm while maintaining perspective,
stays focused while being aspirational.
• A mentor upholds the virtues of his chosen employment,
trade, or profession and is loyal to his company or organi-
zation, while at the same time recognizing its weaknesses,
and constructively helps his protégé deal with those same
weaknesses.
As you can see, the composite of the ideal mentor is some-
what daunting—and probably impossible to find. Few individu-
als would satisfy all of the expectations listed above—but then,
the statements came from six organizations. You’ll be relieved to
know that perfection is not a prerequisite for being a mentor!
The key is to clearly identify the attributes your organization
requires in a mentor—which may or may not be similar to those
above.

The Distinction Between a Coach and a Mentor
The distinction between coach and mentor is not always clear-
cut. There’s ambiguity in all management activities, and the dif-
ference between mentoring and coaching can sometimes be
elusive.