Page 198 - Using the Enneagram System to Identify and Grow Your Leadership Strengths and Achieve Maximum Success

Become an Excellent Communicator 173

voices, emphasizing key words, moving closer to their audience,
or increasing their overall energy level. Eights may also say little,
sit back, watch everyone else’s interactions, and then decide
whether to enter the conversation to either add a missing point or
turn the entire conversation around to another perspective. How-
ever, when Eights are quiet for extended periods, it usually means
that they are bored, angry, or extremely fatigued.

Listen Fully
Eights can be excellent listeners, particularly with those whom they
like or respect, or with individuals who have information that is
very important to the Eight. However, Eights also detest having
their time wasted and usually just want the answers. They may lis-
ten for a short time, but then show their impatience through short,
direct verbal messages (for example, saying, “So what’s the point
you’re making?”) or through intense body language, starting other
work, or frowning. Eights also stop listening when they perceive
that the other person is (1) being untruthful, (2) directly or indi-
rectly asserting unauthorized or poorly executed control, or (3)
when they feel blindsided and/or blamed.

Give Effective Feedback
Eights usually give feedback in a straightforward way, specifying
what the other person should do instead. This can be helpful
because the other person then knows exactly what to change, why
change is needed, and how to accomplish the change. However,
the Eight’s forthrightness and intensity can be intimidating to those
who need more warmth when discussing vulnerabilities. It helps
when Eights show positive regard for the other person and remind
themselves to give positive feedback and constructive feedback
with equal frequency.

Manage Conflict Constructively
Eights expect others to deal with conflict directly, but will take
sides if they believe that one of the parties is right and the other