Page 296 - Using the Enneagram System to Identify and Grow Your Leadership Strengths and Achieve Maximum Success

270 What Type of Leader Are You?

deeply hurt and surprised to learn that several employees
actively disliked her. For this reason, when she changed
companies, Libby created a tightly knit group of engineers
because they wanted it that way. She was reluctant to upset
them, even though she had long realized that their exclu-
sivity was not good for the organization. However, with the
realization that she really was well thought of by everyone in
the company, Libby was able to bypass her old fears and
lead the change effort that she knew was important. She was
nonetheless angry with herself for having let her feelings
prevent her from doing what she had known all along was
best for the organization.

Development Stretches for Fours

MAKE SUPPORTIVE STATEMENTS TO YOURSELF EVERY DAY Because
Fours can be very hard on themselves, it is important for you to
make positive statements to yourself on a daily basis, six times per
day at a minimum. Statements such as “You did a very good job on
that” and “How wonderful that you enjoy your children so much”
are fine, as long as you actually believe what you say. When you do
this many times a day for three months, you will find that your neg-
ative self-talk becomes less pervasive.

DEVELOP EFFECTIVE FILTERS FOR BOTH POSITIVE AND NEGATIVE INFOR-
MATION ABOUT YOURSELF Fours tend to absorb negative infor-
mation that they receive about themselves and have a limited
ability to filter out what they believe is false. In addition, when
Fours hear positive information about themselves, they often dis-
card it without integrating any of it into their sense of self. It is
important for you to develop well-functioning filters that allow you
to absorb both positive and negative information only after you
have decided that you agree with it. Each time someone tells you
something about yourself, before you take it in or discard it, ask
yourself this: Do I really agree with this information?