Page 117 - Communication Processes Volume 3 Communication Culture and Confrontation

92 Karine Bates

of her husband. They also gave her her share of the husband’s land.
Her only child staying far away, no one else owns the property jointly
with her. The third widow got her house under a special scheme for the
poor. She was already a widow when the house was built and, therefore,
she became the sole owner.
Some of the women interviewed were not aware who the owner of
the land of their deceased husband was. One widow aged above 60
said that she did not know whether she has an official title. She said
that her sons probably had equal share, but maybe only the elder son
had an official title. She stays with her sons in a separate house, and
wishes to cook separately from her daughters-in-law. According to
her, only some of her grandsons were helping her financially. Still,
due to her precarious economic situation, she is obliged—despite her
age—to work in others’ fields to feed herself. Another widow said that
the house was in her name, a fact not confirmed by tax records. The
official owner of the house was unknown.
According to a majority of the respondents, it is necessary to go to
court in order to obtain a share in the husband’s property. So, why do
they not do so? Some of the reasons given were linked to the function-
ing of the legal system itself: the cost of the procedures, the excessive
time taken by the courts to deliver the decision, the difficulty to get the
sanction executed, and so on. They also cited social factors to explain
why they did not claim their rights. As a young widow pointed out, ‘It
is not good to create conflict with the parents-in-law. We have to keep
quiet for the sake of our children.’ This reasoning is also found among
the widows who do not stay with their in-laws anymore. They hope that
the latter will help them later on although they have been practically
abandoned by the family of their husband.
To go to court is a matter of shame for a widow and her family.
Some men told me that before going to the court, the brothers of the
widows try to solve matters with the family with whom they have a
disagreement. Some men also said that it was their duty to help their
sister if she became a widow. In practice, the widows, especially the
older ones have lost contacts with their brothers or receive little help
from them. If a widow finally does bring her case to court, it is not often
an individual decision; it will be a familial decision. Both the financial
and psychological support from the brothers and extended family are
necessary in most cases to confront the legal system, although not
always present.