Page 93 - Crucial Conversations

MAKE IT SAFE 75

would hurt quality and potentially drive away your biggest cus­
tomers. Since you only had another hour with the VP, you chose
to talk through the issue rather than conduct the tour. Your
future depended on that particular conversation. Fortunately,
you were able to avert the plan. Unfortunately, you forgot to get
word to the team that had worked so hard.
As you walked back to your office after escorting the execu­
tive to his car, you bumped into the team. Bleary-eyed and disap­
pointed, all six of them were now fuming. No visit, no phone
call, and now it was clear from the way you were sprinting on by
that you weren't even going to stop and give them a simple expla­
nation.
Ouch.
That's when things started turning ugly. "We pulled an all­
nighter, and you didn't even bother to come by! That's the last
u
time we're busting our hump for yo ! "
Time stands still. This conversation has just turned crucial.
The employees who had worked so hard are obviously upset.
They feel disrespected.
But you miss that point. Why? Because now you feel disre­
spected. They've attacked you. So you stay stuck in the content
of the conversation-thinking this has something to do with the
factory tour.
"I had to choose between the future of the company and the
plant tour. 1 chose our future, and I'd do it again if 1 had to."

Now both you and they are fighting for respect. This is getting
you nowhere fast. But what else could you do?
Instead of getting hooked and fighting back, break the cycle.
Sec their aggressive behavior for what it is-a sign of violated
sarety-then step out of the conversation, build safety, and step
back into the content. Here's how.