Page 149 - Effective Communication Soft Skills Strategies For Success by Nitin Bhatnagar, Mamta Bhatnagar

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Psychology and Communication | 137

attention from the person sitting next to us, whom we are interested
in getting to know better.
• Control: The need for control involves a striving for power, for being
in charge, for running things, and for influencing one’s environment.
The need for control is not necessarily related to the need for inclu-
sion. Some people enjoy being in charge of things even if no one is
aware that they are running the show. These people are high on con-
trol while low on inclusion-power, behind-the-throne types. On the
other hand, some people may seek leadership or prestige positions
not for the power they bring but for the attention they produce. This
is why it is not always easy to determine whether a person’s behaviour
is influenced by one need or the other.
Naturally, some people are quite low on the need for control and
are not interested at all in taking initiative, in assuming responsibili-
ties, in making decisions, or in leading a group. As is true for the
inclusion need, a mixed group composed of highs and lows on the
control dimension has a better chance of getting things done.
Too many ‘leaders’ and not enough ‘followers’ may result in a con-
stant struggle for leadership and the ensuing climate of competition
may not be conductive to accomplishing much. On the other hand,
too many ‘followers’ and no ‘leader’ may result in apathy as not much
may get done.
• Affection: The need for affection has to do with how close people
want to be to one another. Some people like to be very intimate and
enjoy warm relationships even with relatively casual acquaintances.
They enjoy talking about themselves on a personal level and expect
similar behaviour on the part of others. They want and need to be
liked. Sometimes, people high on the need for affection are perceived
by as too friendly or coming on too strong. Affection is closely related
to disclosing a kind of behaviour which can have a great effect on our
interpersonal relations.
On the other hand, some people prefer to keep others at a distance.
They do not like to become too friendly too quickly. They do not wish
to be too personal with others or to share too much of themselves
with people they do not know well. They may have a strong distaste
for closeness and intimacy except with carefully selected people.
These people are usually perceived as aloof, cold, or ‘superior’.
In the case of affection a mixed group is not the best combination
for productive interpersonal relationships. Cold people and warm
people do not mix well. Each type makes the other uncomfortable
and they find it hard to figure out each other. Neither is able to satisfy
the other’s needs.

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