Page 124 - Fearless Leadership

Victim Mentality and Playing Small 111

focus your attention, how you choose to act and react, and whether you
choose to play big or play small. You may be powerless to change others,
but you are not helpless. You always have a choice.
To be a fearless leader, you must be willing to get out of your rut and
overcome automatic behaviors that limit you—your blind spots, the need
to be right, and victim mentality. You must take a bold stand; define how
you want to play the game and the difference you want to make.
If you choose to play big—and this is definitely your personal choice—
then act decisively, and decide where you want to focus your attention and
what you want to accomplish. Identify where you have been conspiring
against others and change your behavior without expecting others to
change theirs. Rewrite your story and change your interpretation so you
are no longer the victim, and others are no longer the persecutors. In doing
this, you will expand your personal context and, therefore, expand your
ability to play big. Although it may not appear possible right now, you will
be able to build committed partnerships, even with those you currently
perceive as your opponents.

LEADERSHIP EXPLORATION
The purpose of this assignment is to identify where you are resigned,
shrinking the game, or engaged in victim mentality. As with all assign-
ments, do not rely on your point of view only. Ask others to provide you
with candid input, and listen to what they have to say. If you are not will-
ing to authentically listen to input from others, you are not ready to do
this assignment.

1. Answer the following questions to identify if you are resigned.
• Do you feel that no matter what you do, it is never enough and
will not change anything?
• Has your enthusiasm or energy changed recently? When did it
change?
• Are you abrupt and short fused on small matters that normally
would not bother you?
• Do you isolate yourself from others by doing such things as
closing your office door, working at home, or avoiding
conversations?