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Making Your Words Count 173

to contend with someone who wants to be heard for the sake of it.
And the extroverts can still make it hard for others to speak. This is
where her facilitation skills come in handy. She explains, “This is
when I become a good active listener.” To some extent she’ll let go and
allow others get things out in the open. After the conversation has nat-
urally wound itself down, she’ll step up and summarize what she’s
heard, coalescing all the perspectives, ideas, and concerns. And she’ll
recommend some kind of action that builds on several of those points.
Anne says that this technique lets the others know that she has listened
to them, but it keeps the meeting from turning into an exercise in
idea-generating for the sake of it that doesn’t lead to a conclusion or
action.
So being a good communicator can mean being a good facilita-
tor. When something goes wrong, be curious. Connect the diversity
of ideas and perspectives into a greater and more innovative solu-
tion. Look at ways to draw out those who need and should be heard.
See the following sidebar for several tips for when a situation calls
for you to be a facilitator.

Tips for Being a Facilitator

1. Use questions to steer parties toward an outcome.
2. Propose ideas by using pros and cons.
3. Point out common patterns among the comments of various
parties.
4. Hold off making assumptions until you fully understand
where others are coming from.
5. Incorporate views, ideas, and information from several
people in your final summation or action plan.