Page 224 - Microaggressions in Everyday Live Race, Gender, and Sexual Orientation

198 sexual - orientation microaggressions and heterosexism

(Carrubba, 2005; Fassinger, 1991). They fear losing friends and families, being
socially ostracized, and physically assaulted (Morales & Sheafor, 2004).
Because race and gender are visible physical traits that clearly convey the
sociodemographic group to which a person belongs, hiding, in most cases, is
not a possibility for an African American person or for a woman. Thus, hid-
ing, physical invisibility, and being in the closet are not available to them as
a means of dealing with discrimination and prejudice. Most LGBTs are in a
completely different situation in that they are not visible minorities, and can
keep their sexual orientation a secret if they so desire (Douce, 2005). On the
surface, this might be viewed as an advantage, but there are many downsides
to remaining in the closet as well.
First, hiding and being in the closet can occur through an identity struggle
by LGBT youths who are experiencing identity conflicts between what and

how they are suppose to act/feel (heterosexual) and their own burgeoning
internal same-sex attractions (Barrett & Logan, 2002; Parker & Thompson,
1990). Many youths who experience feelings of differentness deny them
because they are surrounded by messages that tell LGBs homosexuality is an
abomination. Worse yet, these messages often come from their own parents.
LGBT youths are left without anyone to share their concerns, fears, and appre-
hensions about their sexuality; their parents are heterosexual and assume their
sons and daughters are likewise. In order to remain in the closet, they must
sidetrack their sexual identity development, deny their own sexual orientation,
and engage in self - deception (they are heterosexual). Such psychological
maneuvers have major impact on the healthy development of LGBT youths,
lead to feelings of isolation, confused identities, and psychological distress.
Second, silence and secrecy in LGBTs can occur in individuals who are
consciously aware of their same - sex orientation but who are forced or choose
not to disclose their sexual orientation for fear of negative consequences. In
many respects, our society colludes with such a decision by enforcement of
formal and informal “ Don ’ t ask, don ’ t tell ” policies (Douce, 2005). These
policies represent microaggressions that communicate to LGBTs that there
is something wrong with their sexual orientation and that coming out will
result in major negative consequences: being discharged from the military,

isolated at work, not being promoted, being fired, or disowned by your family
(O ’ Brien, 2005). But what are the internal consequences to LGBTs who remain
silent when they hear a homophobic comment, witness discriminatory sexual -
orientation behaviors, and are placed in situations that require them to pretend
to be heterosexual?

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