Page 17 - stephen covey The seven habits of highly effective people

THE SEVEN HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PEOPLE Brought to you by FlyHeart

The more closely our maps or paradigms are aligned with these principles or natural laws, the more
accurate and functional they will be. Correct maps will infinitely impact our personal and
interpersonal effectiveness far more than any amount of effort expended on changing our attitudes and
behaviors.

Principles of Growth and Change

The glitter of the personality ethic, the massive appeal, is that there is some quick and easy way to
achieve quality of life -- personal effectiveness and rich, deep relationships with other people -- without
going through the natural process of work and growth that makes it possible
It's symbol without substance. It's the "get rich quick" scheme promising "wealth without work."
And it might even appear to succeed -- but the schemer remains.
The personality ethic is illusory and deceptive. And trying to get high-quality results with its
techniques and quick fixes is just about as effective as trying to get to some place in Chicago using a
map of Detroit.
In the words of Erich Fromm, an astute observer of the roots and fruits of the personality ethic.
Today we come across an individual who behaves like an automaton, who does not know or
understand himself, and the only person that he knows is the person that he is supposed to be, whose
meaningless chatter has replaced communicative speech, whose synthetic smile has replaced genuine
laughter, and whose sense of dull despair has taken the place of genuine pain. Two statements may be
said concerning this individual. One is that he suffers from defects of spontaneity and individuality
which may seem to be incurable. At the same time it may be said of him he does not differ essentially
from the millions of the rest of us who walk upon this earth.
In all of life, there are sequential stages of growth and development. A child learns to turn over, to
sit up, to crawl, and then to walk and run. Each step is important and each one takes time. No step
can be skipped.
This is true in all phases of life, in all areas of development, whether it be learning to play the piano
or communicate effectively with a working associate. It is true with individuals, with marriages, with
families, and with organizations.
We know and accept this fact or principle of process in the area of physical things, but to understand
it in emotional areas, in human relations, and even in the area of personal character is less common and
more difficult. And even if we understand it, to accept it and to live in harmony with it are even less
common and more difficult. Consequently, we sometimes look for a shortcut, expecting to be able to
skip some of these vital steps in order to save time and effort and still reap the desired result.
But what happens when we attempt to shortcut a natural process in our growth and development?
If you are only an average tennis player but decide to play at a higher level in order to make a better
impression, what will result? Would positive thinking alone enable you to compete effectively against a
professional?
What if you were to lead your friends to believe you could play the piano at concert hall level while
your actual present skill was that of a beginner?
The answers are obvious. It is simply impossible to violate, ignore, or shortcut this development
process. It is contrary to nature, and attempting to seek such a shortcut only results in disappointment
and frustration.
On a 10-point scale, if I am at level two in any field, and desire to move to level five, I must first take
the step toward level three. "A thousand-mile journey begins with the first step" and can only be taken
one step at a time.