Page 71 - Becoming a Successful Manager

62 ESTABLISHING A SOLID DEPARTMENTAL FOUNDATION

Intent: I am curious not accusatory, and I desire to be
productive not destructive.

Perhaps you can give some thought to how the results with an
improved attitude might be different from those that would have
resulted from the initial attitude.
The three elements are interdependent: what you tell yourself
creates thoughts and feelings, what you want tempers those thoughts
and feelings with something rational, which makes room for making
sure your intent is clear as well. When they are all aligned, the actions
are in line as well. Therefore, to change what you tell yourself and
the resulting actions, you must adjust and align your attitudes.
In general, positive attitudes, such as genuine caring or love,
lead to helpful actions, whereas negative attitudes, such as unrea-
sonable fear and anger, lead to defensive behaviors.
Following are three examples of how these elements work
together when you give yourself positive messages.

Example l
What you tell yourself: I am a student of everybody.
Aligned attitudes: Inquisitive; curious; receptive to learning;
respectful of “teachers.”
Actions: Ask appropriate questions; listen attentively; express
appreciation for the teacher’s time and attention.

Example 2
What you tell yourself: I am a human being fi rst, a manager
second.
Aligned attitudes: Caring and compassionate; sensitive;
considerate and thoughtful.
Actions: Listen attentively; offer help when needed; be
reasonably fl exible.