Page 20 - Communication in Organizations Basic Skills and Conversation Models

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Listening skills

Introduction

Not only is it important to have a good structure in a conversation, but it is also important
to let your conversational partner know that he is being listened to (Bostrom, 1990; Steil,
1991). First of all it is stimulating for the partner, and second one can avoid the problems
that occur when one does not listen well. Burley-Allen (1995) has described listening as
‘the forgotten skill’, indicating that a lot of people tend to speak too quickly without
having paid careful attention to one another. In Table 2.1 we present an overview of the
listening skills that are discussed in this chapter.

Table 2.1 Overview of the listening skills

‘Non’-selective listening skills; attentive behaviour Selective listening skills
• Nonverbal behaviour • Asking questions
• Minimal encouragers • Paraphrasing
• Reflection of emotions
• Concreteness
• Summarizing

In the folllowing section on ‘non’-selective listening skills it is explained that the listener
has only little influence on the conversation. He gives other people all the time to explain
their story and only responds by giving attention. These skills are necessary to stimulate
the conversation partner into talking. Selective listening skills are used by the listener to
find out and select certain aspects of the conversation that he finds important. ‘Non’-
selective skills are hardly ever used alone. Even when one is only paying attention to
somebody’s story, one often unconsciously selects what one finds important and gives
more attention to that part. That is why we have put ‘non’ in inverted commas.