Page 38 - Effective communication Skills by Dale King

becoming desensitized to violence or why there are some people who feel

less or more guilty about hurting others.

The empathetic brain has evolved to become very adaptive in certain
situations. Having empathy is helpful because it helps us to understand other
people, but there are times when switching of empathy might be beneficial
when it comes to protecting your life, or another’s life.

Empathy in Communication

We’ve covered a lot of scientific information about empathy and how it
affects our daily lives, but we need to look at exactly how it helps with
communication. The biggest benefit of bringing empathy into a conversation
is being able to handle a confrontation. This is a situation that nobody likes to
find their self in, but it happens from time to time. People get angry, and then

the conversation turns into a shouting match, but with empathy, it doesn’t
have to.

Anger is a normal emotion and is meant to be used as a way to communicate
something. Anger can also push people away, but you really want is to be
heard and connect with people. The same is true for a person who chooses a
passive-aggressive behavior instead of a direct one. It’s aggression, whether
straightforward or not. This is where empathy plays an important role.

Whether or not it is anger rearing its ugly head in conversation, you can use
these six steps to take the conversation back to neutral ground.

1. Focus on what is actually happening and allow yourself to become
more self-aware.

If you are the one that is angry or upset, give yourself some time. Trying to
communicate while in a frustrated state won’t turn out well. Words don’t

come out right and things that shouldn’t be said, get said. Extremely
emotions hijack the brain. When the emotions centers of the brain become
overactive, people have a lot harder time thinking logically. Allow yourself to
calm down or cool off, and then see if you are able to think more clearly and
communicate yourself more effectively.

If it is the other person becoming emotional, the first thing you should NOT
do is tell them to calm down. Never, in the history of the world, has this ever

helped a person calm down. If the person begins to cry, sit quietly and let