Page 102 - Fearless Leadership
P. 102

Chapter

                                            4



                       Victim Mentality and


                               Playing Small






                      People seem not to see that their opinion of the world
                             is also a confession of their character.
                              —RALPH WALDO EMERSON (1803–1882)








                o you play big and give everything you have at all times? Do you face
             Dchallenging situations head-on and confront the real issue? When we
             ask this of leaders, the majority reply, “Absolutely. That’s the only way I
             play—full-out or not at all.”
               Fearless leadership begins when you choose to play big—without lim-
             its to what is possible—despite difficult or challenging circumstances.
             When you play big, your behavior is consistent with your values and
             beliefs; you throw your hat in the ring and fully engage.
               However, even with your zest and commitment, you will fall into auto-
             matic behaviors that keep you playing small. In this chapter, we add
             another automatic behavior—victim mentality—and how it contributes
             to resignation, shrinking the game, and building silos. This is pivotal in
             understanding why internal groups struggle and engage in warfare against
             each other. It brings together the need to be right, blind spots, and vic-
             tim mentality in a way that illuminates the problem and introduces its
             solution.
               We also discuss the imperative need to move beyond denial so new
             thinking and behavior can occur. Then we examine the importance of per-


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