Page 55 - stephen covey The seven habits of highly effective people

THE SEVEN HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PEOPLE Brought to you by FlyHeart

limitations of a money center is a crisis in my life or in the life of a loved one.
Money-centered people often put aside family or other priorities, assuming everyone will
understand that economic demands come first. I know one father who was leaving with his children
for a promised trip to the circus when a phone call came for him to come to work instead. He declined.
When his wife suggested that perhaps he should have gone to work, he responded, "The work will
come again, but childhood won't." For the rest of their lives his children remembered this little act of
priority setting, not only as an object lesson in their minds but as an expression of love in their hearts.
Work Centeredness. Work-centered people may become "workaholics," driving themselves to
produce at the sacrifice of health, relationships, and other important areas of their lives. Their
fundamental identity comes from their work -- "I'm a doctor," "I'm a writer," "I'm an actor."
Because their identity and sense of self-worth are wrapped up in their work, their security is
vulnerable to anything that happens to prevent them from continuing in it. Their guidance is a
function of the demands of the work. Their wisdom and power come in the limited areas of their work,
rendering them ineffective in other areas of life.
Possession Centeredness. A driving force of many people is possessions -- not only tangible,
material possessions such as fashionable clothes, homes, cars, boats, and jewelry, but also the intangible
possessions of fame, glory, or social prominence. Most of us are aware, through our own experience,
how singularly flawed such a center is, simply because it can vanish rapidly and it is influenced by so
many forces.
If my sense of security lies in my reputation or in the things I have, my life will be in a constant state
of threat and jeopardy that these possessions may be lost or stolen or devalued. If I'm in the presence
of someone of greater net worth or fame or status, I feel inferior. If I'm in the presence of someone of
lesser net worth or fame or status, I feel superior. My sense of self-worth constantly fluctuates. I
don't have any sense of constancy or anchorage or persistent selfhood. I am constantly trying to
protect and insure my assets, properties, securities, position, or reputation. We have all heard stories
of people committing suicide after losing their fortunes in a significant stock decline or their fame in a
political reversal.
Pleasure Centeredness. Another common center, closely allied with possessions, is that of fun and
pleasure. We live in a world where instant gratification is available and encouraged. Television and
movies are major influences in increasing people's expectations. They graphically portray what other
people have and can do in living the life of ease and "fun."
But while the glitter of pleasure-centered lifestyles is graphically portrayed, the natural result of
such lifestyles -- the impact on the inner person, on productivity, on relationships -- is seldom
accurately seen.
Innocent pleasures in moderation can provide relaxation for the body and mind and can foster
family and other relationships. But pleasure, per se, offers no deep, lasting satisfaction or sense of
fulfillment. The pleasure-centered person, too soon bored with each succeeding level of "fun,"
constantly cries for more and more. So the next new pleasure has to be bigger and better, more
exciting, with a bigger "high." A person in this state becomes almost entirely narcissistic, interpreting all
of life in terms of the pleasure it provides to the self here and now.
Too many vacations that last too long, too many movies, too much TV, too much video game
playing -- too much undisciplined leisure time in which a person continually takes the course of least
resistance -- gradually wastes a life. It ensures that a person's capacities stay dormant, that talents
remain undeveloped, that the mind and spirit become lethargic and that the heart is unfulfilled.
Where is the security, the guidance, the wisdom, and the power? At the low end of the continuum, in
the pleasure of a fleeting moment.
Malcom Muggeridge writes "A Twentieth-Century Testimony":
When I look back on my life nowadays, which I sometimes do, what strikes me most forcibly about