Page 106 - Becoming a Successful Manager

Listening—Really Listen and You Will Hear More than Words 97

“How are things going, Bill?” Bill, not being much of a talker,
would always say, “Fine” or “Very well, thank you.”
One week, in response to the same question, Bill said, “OK, I
guess.” Although this response should have been acknowledged,
Mitch wasn’t sensitive to the fact that this answer was markedly
different from Bill’s usual replies. Thus, Mitch assumed that
everything was just fi ne with Bill. After all, that’s what the words
communicated. You can imagine Mitch’s surprise when, after a
couple of weeks of this exchange, Bill announced his resignation
because he had found another position more to his liking.
A simple acknowledgment—“What do you mean by you
‘guess’? Is something wrong?” or “Sounds as if something’s both-
ering you; let’s get together to talk about it”—would have given
Mitch a chance to resolve Bill’s concerns.
Often the emphasis on brevity and speed in the virtual world
can preclude such sensitivity. But there can be a signifi cant price
to pay.

Principles and Guidelines

for Acknowledging

Nonverbal Communication

Your employees frequently express their thoughts and feelings by
what they do or don’t do. Since those nonverbal actions and reactions
are often more powerful than words, they must be acknowledged,
just as emotions expressed through words must be acknowledged.
Under no circumstances should they be ignored. The principles and
guidelines that follow, as well as the examples of how to acknowledge
both negative and positive actions, will provide you with the tools
you need to develop healthy relationships with your employees.