Page 215 - Appreciative Leadership

188 Appreciative Leadership

Needless to say, I was stunned. And though I deeply dis-
agreed with how he handled himself, I was incredibly grateful
to know the truth—as was he. He took my feedback to heart,
and started moderating his behavior around other employees.
Eventually, we became friends, staying connected with one

another years after we both left the company. All this hap-
pened because I took the risk to tell the truth.

It’s easy to be honest when everything is going right. Th ough we
often forget to do so, it feels good to share our thoughts, feelings, and

ideas when we feel happy, fulfilled, respected, and safe. This suggests that

as we create nurturing and safe environments by practicing Apprecia-
tive Leadership, we encourage people to be honest with themselves, with
one another, and with us. Sheryl told us this story about what happened
when she received honest feedback from her workforce:

One day, a staff member came to my offi ce, and said, “We’ve
got a problem. All of us got together and determined that we
can’t work as fast as you, that we can’t work your same long
hours. In other words, we can’t be you. You have to lighten up
a little.” I gave her a big hug and said, “I could have gone on

forever and not have known this. Thank you for telling me.
From now on, you say the word and I’ll back off.” Even though

it was difficult to hear, I kept my promise to listen to their

concerns, and our new way of operating worked really well.

Loving and supportive parents regularly share this kind of experi-
ence. When they create a sense of safety and support, their children are
more likely to “come clean” with mistakes. Or they will stay close to their
parents, even as they reject a family tradition or choose diff erent values