Page 141 - Roy W. Rice - CEO Material How to Be a Leader in Any Organization-McGraw-Hill (2009)

122 • CEO Material: How to Be a Leader in Any Organization

risk of disease, the fact that others may not do it, what you’ve been taught,
and what you’ve experienced in the past.

If a picture paints a thousand words, appropriate touch conveys 10
times that.
ƒ

One day, out of nowhere, I reached out and touched him. He crys-
tallized. He diminished into powder.

ƒ

In Hollywood, people touch you not because they like you, but to see
how soft you are before they eat you alive.

The contact I recommend is not a lascivious cop-a-feel, fondle,
grope, power-play, or hit. It’s calmly, purposefully reaching out and delib-
erately touching on an appropriate part of the body—generally from the
wrist to the shoulder. (As you get more globally aware, you’ll discover the
variation of acceptability throughout the world.)
Both men and women should extend a hand to shake regardless of
the other person’s age, sex, race, rank, or culture. Clasp (your dry) palm
to palm, not fingers to palm, with enough extended pressure to notice a
connection being made. (Don’t be so tentative that it feels like you’re
testing a mango for ripeness.)
If you decide to hug someone, to minimize it being misinterpreted
(as anything can be), you can say, “I want to hug you in thanks for the
excellent work you’ve done.” Clasp their right hand, like a typical hand-
shake, and then plant your left arm on the top of the person’s spine. Lean
in, but chests need not touch, nor pelvises. Turn your head considering
the height differences so that you don’t brush your face/lips against the
person’s face, collar, or ear—unless you’re also going for a kiss. Hold the
embrace a split second. Retreat while still clasping the right hand, step
back, pause, and release the clasp.
If you don’t want to hug but want to do more than a handshake,
use your left hand to grasp the other person’s wrist, elbow, or shoulder
while shaking hands (the higher up you go, the more connection this
represents).