Page 145 - Effective Communication Skills Mastery Bible 4 Books in 1 Boxset by Tuhovsky, Ian

think very differently and look at the whole thing from an

entirely new perspective. More than once I had to take a

moment to reflect on my response to be able to reach an

important and meaningful conclusion. The solid workout for

my mind, intertwined with frequent explosions of laughter,

made this conversation stay in my memory for a very long
time.

Since that day I would often wonder why some

conversations are just usual chit-chat fluff-type time fillers,

while others can be a unique, almost spiritual experience. By
doing a conscious observation while carefully listening to

conversations of others and testing of various different

concepts, I came to a sudden realization that how a particular

conversation goes depends vastly on myself.

I can give it a tone, change its direction, fascinate an

interlocutor or invite them to answer interesting, challenging
and tricky questions. I can do a whole bunch of things,

becoming a source of fascinating conversation. And the most

interesting aspect is that it does not only apply to chats with

friends—imagine how powerful and useful it can be in

business or in negotiations!

In this chapter I will show you the eleven most useful ideas

to make a conversation unique. They are all briefly

described below, with examples and links to wider sources of

knowledge on a particular subject. Learn, test and check the
effects!

1. Use the Matrix of Entry

By a good conversation starter, you can define the way in

which it will be received. If you start with, “Dude, yesterday