Page 27 - Effective communication Skills by Dale King

Chapter 4: Controlling A Conversation

Do you wish that you could ever have a conversation with a person that you
have never met before and they automatically like you?

Take a moment to think about people in your life who seem to always bring

the best out of you whenever you have a conversation with them. You feel
comfortable talking with them and you could continue talking with them
forever. They could be somebody that you have known your whole life or
somebody you have just met, but the conversation flows naturally and
smoothly.

If you wish you could have this natural ability, don’t worry. There are ways
to give you this ability. You can be in control of a conversation and gain the
interest of others. Now, while I may use the word control, I don’t mean that

you are the one constantly talking and “controlling” everything. I simply
mean that you know how to work a conversation so that it continues flowing
naturally. The most important factors in a good conversation are active
listening, show curiosity, and keeping the sarcasm to a minimum.

But to give you a good start, here are a few conversation tips:

1. Make the conversation about the other person.

Have you ever had the misfortune of sitting through a conversation with
somebody who went on and on about something that you didn’t have the
slightest interest in? You likely felt wiped out by the end of the conversation
and it probably felt like they were talking to their self. They are oblivious to
the idea that you might not be interested in what they like.

The best conversations tend to be the ones that show an interest in the
listener, their interest, and their world. Most people like to talk about their

self. Take the time to ask them an open-ended question about something that
you may have noticed. If you make sure that you give them positive feedback
or a sincere compliment, you will have made a great start. Conversationalists
are sincerely interested in other people, take the time to notice things, and use
that information to fuel and start their conversations.