Page 132 - Effective Communication Skills Mastery Bible 4 Books in 1 Boxset by Tuhovsky, Ian

relationship with them or about some kind of situation that

may end, etc. It will save you lot of time and energy. It’s also a

very classy thing to do.

Another great thing you can do when you want to start a

difficult conversation with someone and to make people drop
their guard a little bit is to ask them to help you with a task.

For example, if you want to talk about something rather

difficult with your kids, you could ask them to help you

prepare a salad or some other dish or maybe pay them to help

you paint the fence to make them focus on the work even
more. That way you are lowering their defense, making them

listen more carefully and intuitively as they’re focused on a

particular task. It’s much easier to start the conversation

without creating unnecessary tension. You should also remove

as many distractions like smartphones, computer, TV, etc. as
possible. You can also use it at work, asking your employee or

co-worker to help you with organizing files, moving boxes,

etc. It’s a much better idea than just saying, “Hey, Daniel, see

me in my office in five minutes.” Try it and you will be

surprised how effective it can be.

Last thing I want to tell you in this chapter is how to deal
well with negative feedback and criticism. When somebody is

criticizing your work and giving you negative feedback, you

need to remember that what you are doing physically also

affects what is going on mentally. When people criticize us,

we often tend to close down our body language. At the same
time, the ability to receive negative feedback is something

very valuable and useful in life and appreciated in many

companies.