Page 140 - The New Articulate Executive_ Look, Act and Sound Like a Leader

WRITE LIKE YOU SPEAK 131

you want deliberately to obfuscate, then by all means use the passive
voice.) The passive voice takes the “actor”—you—out of the action,
but the active voice puts the actor back in. Examples:

Passive voice: It is imperative that the defense establishment
be refurbished in order that the military operation can be
prosecuted.

Revised: Give us the tools and we will finish the job. (Winston
Churchill in a letter to President Roosevelt)
Passive voice: It is obligatory that all illumination be extin-
guished before the premises are vacated. (government
bureaucrat)

Revised: Turn off the lights when you leave. (FDR telling gov-
ernment bureaucrat how to translate the preceding sentence)

3. Pick short, conversational words. Avoid archaic language that
still lingers in the lexicon but is fast on its way out. We are still prob-
ably years ahead of ourselves on this one, but I still prefer to err on
the side of economy.
Here are some examples:

Old: Notwithstanding our commitment to keep out of the dis-

pute, we should still try to do something to resolve the conflict.
Revised: In spite of our commitment to keep out of the dispute,
we should still try to do something to resolve the conflict.

Old: Inasmuch as we are all in this together, we should prob-
ably try to cooperate rather than argue.

Revised: Since we are all in this together, we should probably
try to cooperate rather than argue.

Old: Therefore, we should take it upon ourselves to provide the
necessary leadership.