Page 169 - Using the Enneagram System to Identify and Grow Your Leadership Strengths and Achieve Maximum Success

144 What Type of Leader Are You?

• Delete language that implies should, ought, right, and wrong.
• Use words that suggest more flexibility and less categorical or
emphatic thinking.
• Adopt language that acknowledges and encourages multiple
points of view.

Constance could rewrite her e-mail as follows:

Dear Ian,
Your idea of giving Janice a bonus would compensate her
for the extra time she has spent and can serve as a reward.
This might be highly motivating, and everyone could feel
pleased about the solution.
Best,
Constance

Although the changes are relatively minor, the elimination of
emphatic words and the inclusion of less definitive words—e.g.,
can, might, and could—give the e-mail a softer tone and invite more
dialogue, should the e-mail recipient disagree with Constance.

Enneagram Style Twos

Create Genuine Relationships
Twos are highly relationship-oriented and are
eager to listen, offer help, and give advice. They
establish rapport easily, and most people believe
that they can count on Twos to be available in a
time of need. However, this may not always be the case, as Twos
can become exhausted from constantly focusing on others at the
expense of themselves. When Twos become aware that they are
giving far more than they are receiving—even though their own
behavior contributed to this situation—they may sever a relation-
ship that was previously important to them.