Page 69 - Effective Communication Skills Mastery Bible 4 Books in 1 Boxset by Tuhovsky, Ian

Similar to “Uncle Good Advice,” but even worse as it’s

totally pointless. Does your style of conversation have features

of a moralizer? “Good and honest men do not act that way!”

“Every intelligent man put in your place…” “You can’t just

say that to people!” “Who do you think you are?” “How can

you listen to this kind of nasty music?” “How can you wear
these bright colored clothes all the time? If I were you…”

“One day you will see!” “When I was your age I never…!”

Are these the sentences that you say often? If the answer is

yes, really think about what you want to achieve by saying

these things. It is the most irritating and the least effective way
of communication. Try to avoid that kind of sentence as often

as possible, unless you want to be perceived as a hunchbacked

grumpy old aunt with a never-ending headache, chronic back

pain and a fiery hatred for cute, small animals.

Being “The Talker”

Maybe you have a tendency for too many frequent,

excessive utterances, meaning that your mouth rarely shuts.

On one hand, it can be a feature of your openness, knowledge

or high intelligence. On the other hand, such need for a

constant self-expression can be overwhelming for others.

This feature is rarely required in everyday situations (only

sometimes, when you first meet someone, when they’re shy

and you want to kick start the talk) and makes it difficult to

receive genuine info about other people (and also feedback
about yourself) during the conversation. Too much excessive

talking from your side can be discouraging in the early stages

of relationships and too often you may wonder why a selling

transaction was cancelled or why somebody avoids contacting

you. It feels like hanging out with a parrot or an actor