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                                                      Conflict Management and Negotiation Skills     |    303

                            respectful of each other as equals; both contribute to the solution. There is
                            no force, no threats, no crying or whining or other pressure to get one’s way.
                            You  should  possess  logic,  respect,  and  consideration  of  each  other.  Both
                            accept in advance that the final ‘solution’ must be acceptable to both. No one
                            is drawn; everyone wins as much as possible.
                                If you are negotiating for a promotion or trying to sell an idea, obviously
                            you must amass all the evidence supporting your points. For the promotions,
                            list all of the strengths you bring to the company, what extra responsibilities
                            you will shoulder, how your salary can be made contingent on your produc-
                            tivity, how much support you have from colleagues, etc. Put together your
                            best arguments and present them well. Don’t just assume the decision-makers
                            will ‘consider your merits’, even if you say nothing.
                                If you can’t think of good solutions to the conflict, try brainstorming
                            with  friends,  colleagues,  or  with  person  with  whom  you  are  in  conflict.
                            Both of you are looking ways you both can win. Do some reading. Try to be
                            creative.


              both of you present your plans for Resolving the conflict: try to integrate
              the best of both plans. or, Make a Fair offer or express a Request.
              negotiate the differences.

                            Don’t present your ideas as the ‘ideal solution’; be tentative and honestly
                            welcome different or better ideas. Nevertheless, clearly state the logical
                            reasons for the plans or offer you are proposing. Make it obvious that you
                            have considered the other person’s needs and preferences.
                                It may be wise to present two of your best alternatives and then ask
                            other  person  which  he/she  likes  the  most  or  if  he/she  can  see  ways  to
                            improve on your proposals. This shows your flexibility. If the other person
                            seems unhappy with your suggestions, ask: ‘What would you do if were in
                            my shoes?’ or ‘What don’t you like about my suggestion?’ . These kinds of
                            discussion may disclose the other person’s interests and motives, which can
                            perhaps be integrated.
                                It is often to your advantage to consider what your alternatives are if
                            you do not get your ‘interests’ met through this negotiation process. If you
                            have  other  acceptable  options  (besides  the  one  you  are  negotiating  for),
                            that gives you some security and some power because you can always walk
                            away from these negotiations. Also, you might not always but sometimes be
                            wise to reveal to the other person that you have other choices. If you do not
                            have good alternative (like another job opportunity), present your best case,
                            appeal to the other person’s sense of fairness, and use the opinion or factual
                            information to support your proposals.
                                Normally, the other person will have his/her own plan or will make a
                            counter-proposal. Do not attack the plan immediately. Instead, earnestly ask






       Bhatnagar_Chapter 14.indd   303                                                   2011-06-23   7:59:53 PM
             Modified Date: Thu, Jun 23, 2011 06:35:43 PM             Output Date: Thu, Jun 23, 2011 07:59:52 PM
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